| Friday, March 7th, 2008 |
| 10:59 pm |
my death is imminent............
well everyone. its been real. its been fun. but it hasnt been real fun. i have finally answered all the questions. all has become known. i know why its all happening the way it is. the view is clear. i know where i stand now. i think its time to move onto a better life. and there is only one way to do that. Grammie im coming to join you in the sky. all will be better soon. im sorry everyone. i now know that i am not wanted. i love you tamara. i always have, and i always will............ Current Mood:  lonely |
| Wednesday, February 13th, 2008 |
| 10:50 pm |
stumbling across an old friend
wow its been a long time again since i have even seen this thing. i dont even know what posessed me to find it. but here i am so i guess i will post. not like anyone i know even remotely looks at this thing. damn that myspace. oh well its eleven and i need to get to bed. later all Current Mood:  fuck off |
| Saturday, October 28th, 2006 |
| 8:44 pm |
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| Wednesday, October 25th, 2006 |
| 12:29 am |
blowing the dust off the cover of an old book
wow have not touched this in a damn long time. STUPID MYSPACE! MYSPACE RUINED MY LJ! wow i dont know what the hell to do. i really dont. someone come up with something. how do i handle such a delicate situation? Leave old job, make more money. lose life. no continue. damn i need sleep. i make no sense. goodnight all. take care. Current Mood:  calm |
| Saturday, October 7th, 2006 |
| 2:57 am |
i think its getting worse
it hurts. bad. really bad i need to get away from here. i need to start over. but i cant. im going to bed. goodnight all. |
| Thursday, September 28th, 2006 |
| 1:24 am |
you all suck
i cant fucking do this anymore. im done. time to say goodbye. stop me if you can................. Current Mood: im gonna make it all red...... |
| Friday, September 22nd, 2006 |
| 11:21 am |
the end of all my pain.
im done. im tired of the the bullshit. i know i say this everytime i post on here but i really am. sooner or later i am gonna snap and then i wont be here anymore. what would you all do then? NOTHING! thats what all of you would do. because none of you give a rats ass about anything but yourselves. thats it. thats all you care about. you all worry about your own lives, advancing youselves and not helping others. you all worry about yourselves. time to face reality. YOU ARE NOT THE ONLY HUMAN BEING ON THIS GODFORSAKEN CHUNK OF DIRT!!!!!! i have a lot of pent up anger right now, and most of it i cant even say anything about because one, your feeble incomprehensible little minds couldnt even begin to fathom it, and two, i just cant. well i have to go. i work 12 to close today. so all of you put that in your mouth. chew it up enjoy that. Current Mood: depressed |
| Sunday, September 17th, 2006 |
| 12:50 am |
I CANT FUCKING TAKE THIS BULLSHIT ANYMORE!
this is it. im done. i cant keep this up. my will is worn thin. $100 measly fucking dollars by wednesday or i get kicked out. 100 GODDAMN FUCKING WORTHLESS FUCKING DOLLARS! I have a $483 fucking insurance bill which needs to be paid by the end of this week. i have a $170 car payment due monday. i have a $100 phone bill due by the end of this month. so you know what? YOU CAN SHOVE IT UP YOUR FUCKING ASS! GO AHEAD KICK ME OUT! ILL LIVE OUT OF MY CAR! YOU MAY THINK THAT YOU ARE HURTING ME WHEN IN TURN YOU ARE ONLY HURTING YOURSELF! "I DONT NEED YOUR FUCKING MONEY!" BULLSHIT YOU DONT! YOU CANT FUCKING BUDGET MONEY IF YOUR LIFE DEPENDED ON IT! IM TIRED OF YOUR BULLSHIT! IM TIRED OF ALL THE BULLSHIT! IM TIRED OF WORKING FOR A CORPORATION WHO BASES THEIR IDEALS ON EMPTY PROMISES! IM DONE! NO MORE! I WILL NOT TAKE THIS SHIT ANYMORE! I AM TAKING A FUCKING STAND! YOU DONT LIKE IT, THEN YOUR IN FOR A PRETTY BUMPY RIDE! FUCK OFF AMERICA! GOOD FUCKING NIGHT! HALLEUJA! HOLY SHIT! im done ranting now. i have shit to do tomorrow. i need sleep. have not eaten all day. just took a vicoprofin for my headache. talk to you all later Current Mood: FUCK YOU ALL! |
| Friday, September 15th, 2006 |
| 1:32 pm |
time for the pain to end.
getting ready to go to work and i realized something. my life is going downhill and fast. i work from two till ten tonight. all i know is that someone is gonna have to calm me down or 309 will get ugly. all my friends are gonig away this weekend. so i have no one to talk to, no one to do anything with. its gonna be a lonely weekend. well i must go now. i must go to my job. goodbye everyone. Current Mood: depressed |
| Monday, September 4th, 2006 |
| 12:21 am |
the saga continues.
this shit is getting old. my body is wracked. fucking collapsed at work today. and not like fainting. i was walking and my one leg just gave out from under me. it was rather fucked up. pissed me off quite a bit. if anyone has any suggestions, please post them. other than that things are ok i guess. i start the paper route next week. thats gonna be rolling in the money. got more hours at work since three people left. its crazy. im hurting alot more in my hip and back lately from it. i dont know if i can handle it much more. im gonna go lay down though. i gotta be at work at 8 and work till two. write more later on. later Current Mood:  sore |
| Thursday, August 31st, 2006 |
| 12:29 pm |
I FUCKING HATE MY JOB!
you know what? I FUCKING HATE THE PEOPLE THAT WORK AT AUTOZONE! all of them are a bunch of fucking retarded people with no respect for myself or each other. When did ignorance and retardation become the new thing? Where was i when this happened? Another thing. apparently AutoZone is "All in the name of customer service" BULLSHIT! anytime i do ANYTHING that is customer service related, i hear about it in the long run, and not in the good way. why cant people just fucking get with the goddamn program. jesus fucking christ. aside from that, its a shitty day as per usual. check engine light on my car is on. owe alot of money to the fucking insurance company. damnit. oh well i need to get back to work. post more when i get home. Current Mood: angry, yet suprisingly horny |
| Tuesday, August 29th, 2006 |
| 1:04 am |
oh man here we go
an hour to go before i go out on my beta test of the paper route. wish me luck. post when i get back. Current Mood:  still horny |
| Monday, August 28th, 2006 |
| 8:41 pm |
awwwww peas
damnit. have not been playing Dirge of Cerberus too long, and i fucking beat it already. that pisses me off. it was way too short. but it was still good. going out tonight i think to see this paper route i am gonna be taking over. god i am a horny little boy. gotta take care of this shit soon or i might explode in a sexy time explosion. oh well. i need to go. looks like tonight and tomorrow are gonna be really quiet. fucking figures. Current Mood: FUCKING HORNY |
| Saturday, August 19th, 2006 |
| 10:41 pm |
fuck you all and burn in hell
i have news. im cancelling the insurance on my car cause they cant get the fucking shit right. started when i sold the 1988 caprice wagon i had. fucking pisses me off. i knew selling that car was a mistake. but yes i am cancelling the policy and i think i am gonna sell my car. fuck this. just got done work. was busy today. did $9,000 in sales. pretty good. no one really irritated me today so i am kinda ok. but there is something else bothering me, but i wont bring that up. oh yeah. i am selling my 1983 Chevrolet Caprice and possibly buying another one. but im not sure yet. i have other plans for the money i get from it. beat the living shit out of my Mercury again tonight. i really need to stop doing that. but when the blood pressure is up i gotta do something. had it doing 105 down Old Bethlehem Pike. damn thing scoots like there is no tomorrow. its a shame i will probably be selling it. gotta work again tomorrow. working ten to five. after that i might go take a drive into the country and just think. i do my best thinking when its quiet and the country is the quietest place i can find. well i think i am gonna go to bed. might stay up a little longer and play some FF7: Dirge Of Cerberus. Kick ass game. good night everyone. Current Mood: high blood pressure=pissed |
| Wednesday, August 16th, 2006 |
| 11:34 pm |
a quiet non relaxing evening.
well it was a quiet evening again. spent my time with bill. have not seen him in a while. helped him with the steering on his truck. washed two cars today, washed a i dont know what year mercury tracer, and i washed a 2002 Ford F-450 dumptruck. god i love this. my business is finally taking off. its a shame i dont have someone with me who wanted to be there with me once i got it going. so i am on my own with that. beat the shit out of my car tonight. i mean i really beat it hard. im taking it in next week hopefully having some shit fixed. found out that Breaking Benjamin is coming to the wachovia arena. i wanna go. ill figure it out damnit well i am gonna go relax, keep my mind off of something, and do some more school work. later on everyone Current Mood: irate |
| 2:21 am |
my time is coming to a close
thats it im done. i fucking give up. my friends are abandoning me my job is letting me down. its time to say good bye. no one cares though. you will all read this and be like oh who gives a fuck. well if that is the attitude of everyone then why am i still here? im being left alone day by day, one by one. if you really care, let me know but im assuming no one does so i probably wont hear from anyone. oh well. Current Mood: depressed |
| Tuesday, August 15th, 2006 |
| 1:10 am |
CORN IS NO PLACE FOR A MIGHTY WARRIOR!
i think its time....... its time for the world to perform total genocide. if you dont know what the hell that means, go look it up. but wait i did it for you. here it is. http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/genocideim tired of people's stupidity. i mean i know i have done some stupid stuff but i mean peoples flat out stupidity is fucking killing me. all i want is for one day to go by where i dont have to deal with peoples retardation. i dont ask for much. it was a quiet weekend. i changed when i am doing that dumptruck. doing it wednesday. thats some money for me. i got some other money coming in but i wont say how. well i am gonna go to bed. i have nothing else to say. hopefully i wake up early tomorrow instead of like today. but that is what happens when you work. what do you want me to tell you. oh well i am out. later everyone Current Mood: mad. nuff said |
| Monday, August 14th, 2006 |
| 12:52 am |
very bored, very aggravated
PEOPLE ARE FUCKING STUPID! THATS ALL THERE IS TO IT! THE WORLD IS DOOMED! FUCK ALL THIS SHIT! im going to bed. later all Current Mood: gonna kill people |
| Sunday, August 13th, 2006 |
| 1:09 am |
more thinking.......
wow this really sucks. very very quiet weekend. i need a new fucking job. seven hours from now i go to work, why am i not sleeping you might ask? welcome to the dark world of insomnia. i think after work tomorrow i am gonna go inspect bill's truck. well not really put stickers on it, but i know what to look for with inspection. then hopefully sometime this coming week, maybe thursday, i have a detailing job lined up. My mom's friend wants me to detail his 2002 Ford F-450 dumptruck. HELLZ YES ILL DO IT! had to pick my mom up from the bar last night. that was amusing. and what was even more amusing was that i was offered a drink by the BT. I even told him that i was under 21 and he was like i dont care. so i might be going back there this week. I think i am gonna make an appointment for my car to have new axles put in it. it needs them. they have been taking a beating from teaching people to learn how to drive a 5 speed, and my driving habits are probably not helping it either. well i am gonna go do something to put my mind to rest. i gotta do something and stop thinking about shit. my head is hurting, my hip is hurting, and my blood pressure is up. you know what, fuck it im going for a drive. take care everyone. this might be it. i dunno Current Mood: i need a good drink |
| Thursday, August 10th, 2006 |
| 3:49 pm |
hmmm
well its been a few days and here i am. sitting here. doing nothing. being bored. my phone works again. which is good. was getting ready to cancel the service there for a minute. tomorrow is gonna be a bad i can feel it. something is telling me that i am gonna be in one hell of a bad mood. i need to find something to do on saturday cause all my friends are gonna be busy and i wont be able to talk to any ove them. can never do anything with anyone on the weekends cause they are always away doing something or i am always working. i wanna get down to the shore again before summer is up but i already know that is not gonna happen at all. just makes me more depressed. i have had thoughts again lately. thoughts that someone doesnt like. but i am not doing anything about it. im just gonna keep being miserable cause nothing i do, want, or desire, works. i fucking hate it. everyone is so much better off than i am. i dont know what to do. if someone, anyone, has some idea, please leave me a suggestion. but i know none of you care, so i know there will be no reply to this. i guess its my time to fade out. im gonna go now......... Current Mood: where are my keys....... |
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